Your Cart

Lousy Smarch Weather

March in New England is a good time to steep in regret and think about all the mistakes you’ve made in your life. Namely, how did I end up here in the hills of Worcester County, watching multiple feet of snow fall over everything, while my friends and colleagues in warmer climates are tending to their tulip beds and planting squash in tidy little patio boxes.

I don’t know if every writer or creator experiences this, but there are days when I look at the body of my work with in a similar way to spring snowstorms- a mix of disdain and disgust. All. That. Time. Dumped, poured, shoveled like coal into a furnace, for what exactly? Stacks of comics. Stupid, weird comics.

I’m kind of sick of comics, to tell the truth. They take so much time and so much energy and so much money. It’s not borderline ridiculous, it’s straight-up insanity. I look at the 10+ years worth that I’ve produced and think none of them really mean anything. None of them capture anything of meaning. They are just here. A brood of mutant thoughts brought into imperfect existence by an inexplicable and inexcusable force of will. Honestly, it’s embarrassing. Making “art” is super embarrassing. Even typing the words now makes me cringe inside. Is this is a working class thing? A lifetime of self-loathing? I don’t know.

I’m working on two new projects right now, and they are both so, so, so very dumb. One is an intergalactic tournament fighting drama, think Dragon Ball Z meets Mad Max in space, and the other is a kind of mash-up of Swamp Thing with The Toxic Avenger that is an ode to my younger days manning the greasy fry stations of fast food restaurants. Alan Moore with an apron.

Looking at two feet of March snow surrounding my house is a lot like looking at stacks of failed comic books surrounding my office. Mistakes were made, I guess.

But also just like comics, why does “quitting” Massachusetts feel like it would be a defeat? Yeah, California or Texas or Sedona, Arizona sound a lot nicer in literally every measurable way, but…what kind of life is that, being happy, healthy, and financially solvent all the time?

So I stay, and watch the snow pile up, and know it is stupid. And I write the stories, which I also know are stupid. And I’m stupid for being here. But here I am. And that’s just the way it is meant to be, for some reason.

Anyways, my next comic project LADYDARKE #3 is now live on Kickstarter. Join the currently 50+ others and sign up for notifications here: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/ladydarke/ladydarke-3-into-the-void. The project launches next week (Tuesday, March 21 to be precise).

It’s the best issue yet, by which I mean not something that I’m completely embarrassed about. I do think there’s something about Laura’s story that approaches…something…and I don’t quite know why it is my burden to tell it, but it feels like it is. So anyways, here we go, one more time.

Enjoy your flowers and veggies. I have to go shovel.

Share this blog